Addiction

The first step in solving a problem is admitting a problem, right? I've grown up terrified that if I ever touched a drop of alcoholic I'd turn into a raving drunk. Not even close to true. I've played with things I shouldn't have and haven't done the worst more than a few times with little desire to try again. But, alas, I am an addict.

I love Coca-Cola products. Love them. I mean I hate them. Love them. Hate them! LOVE THEM! HATE THEM!!!!!

I can't win. I destroy myself over it, but it's clear now. Coke and Fanta have a hold on me.

I was winning the battle earlier this week and last week. I thought about why I wasn't loosing more weight walking everywhere and eating healthier. I get more exercise than I ever did back home, and yeah, I've lost a little weight... but... not as much as I should. And then it hit me: I'm downing two soda's a day. One in the morning as a caffeine boost and one after lunch as a sweet desert. I needed to cut it.

So I switched to black tea. It has all the caffeine [plus booster alkaloids] I need to take me through a long day of teaching, but it's mostly just leaf flavored water. All Chinese businesses and homes have water coolers with hot and chilled water on tap. I went out and bought a special tea mug [it has a mesh net to keep the tea out of your mouth] and now drink about five classes of water a day with no high-fructose corn syrup. I can feel it working already. I feel more energized. I come home and not only want to ride the bike, but I get up and do it instead of vegging out!

Then today came...

Things were good till lunch. Then I had a craving. I needed an orange Fanta. I was in luck... the closest ATM was a fifteen minute walk and I had only enough change on me to take the bus home. Soda or a ride home... easy pick. So I got through it...

When I got home I coaxed Lyndsey to hop on the bike with me to go to a pizza place I found about a mile away while exploring. So we ride out, China-style, girl balanced on the small carrier-rack on the back and arrive after much wobbling. Pizza! I can splurge... I've been good, right?

It comes with coke. I devour it. I order another. I devour it. I come home. I need more! I find leftover coke from the party. I drink 2 cups worth with one gulp. I tell myself to stop. Another giant gulp.

I looked over and noticed an empty 2-liter of Sprite bottle left over from the party that I destroyed without even realizing it. I felt like I was staring at a pile of used hypodermic needles I suddenly realized were mine. I half expected to see the baby from Trainspotting crawling up the wall.

And so, friends, I pledge now... no more. I will not let soda keep me the skinny guy stuck in a slightly chubby body. No more!! For now, anyways.